Journey To The Land of Promise

My brother Ike and I trying not to crash!

Hello dear friends,


I have a lot to update you on mostly because I've had a lot of time to think recently! First off, I want to thank you for praying for Erin and I when we went back to see Sara. All of the bacteria was out of my bloodstream and she tried to build me up a little bit. When we got back home God graciously gave us a few good hours to have some fun. My brother took us on snowmobile rides and we got to go sledding. Unfortunately, winter decided to take Erin out. She fell on some black ice and broke her arm. Thankfully it is healing well. On our way to the ER that night God allowed Erin and I to see the Northern Lights. It was a beautiful gift in the midst of brokenness. God's like that. He always gives good gifts to His children, even in less than ideal circumstances. 


After dropping Erin off at the airport (an ordeal all its own because of slippery roads and lots of accidents) dad and I almost got in a crazy bad accident. It was like something out of an action movie. There we were, minding our own business, when we both noticed something out of the corner of our eye. We were in the middle lane and from the other side of the left lane comes this SUV flying through the air over an embankment. By flying, I mean all four tires were higher than the hood of my dad's SUV. We could see the underneath of the vehicle and it was coming right at us. There was no way it was going to miss us - it was coming fast with a lot of momentum. Dad hit the brakes and we braced ourselves for the impact. (I grabbed my purse because when we got hit it was going to fall on the floor. Nice save right?! Good grief!) At the last possible second, the SUV dropped to the left (the opposite direction it was heading) and the driver managed to keep going (though I'm pretty sure he had a different kind of "accident" if you catch my drift). The only way that vehicle didn't crash and roll, taking us with it, was by the grace of God. He must still have some work for us to do down here!

Ever since that first visit to Sara the beginning of January, life has been rough. I've counted no less than three people who have told either me or one of my parents that Sara must have really done a number on me because I just haven't been myself since seeing her last time. Do I really look that bad?! Ha, I feel that bad! I know that I'm not on an easy journey. Dr. Sara told me the first time I saw her that there would be times on this journey when I would hate her. Well, I don't hate her, but this has been a really hard couple of months. I haven't dealt with such extreme fatigue and illness since before I started seeing Sara almost a year ago. I really hate that I'm back here. It's a horrible part of my journey I thought I had made it through, and it's more than a little discouraging to be back in this all too familiar place. I've gotten a taste of better health and I want it! I want to keep getting healthier and I want this misery to end.

That said, there has been something really good about the last month. I've been able to spend a lot of time with God. We hang out, just Him and me and my big windows and fireplace. I read His Word, I talk to Him, I read about Him and I watch His beautiful creation out of my big windows. He's told me so much. I've gotten to know Him better. He's showing me who He is and how He feels about me. He is wooing me!

One of the things He has shown me is the power of the Son. You can read about that here. Something else He's teaching me is about waiting. I'm not very good at waiting; maybe that's why God's been teaching me about it my entire life! I'm reading in the book of Genesis about the creation of the world and God's plan for redemption. I'm reading about God's promises to Abraham and Sarah. They, too, got tired of waiting. They also didn't trust in God's protection of them. They took matters into their own hands time and again - and the results were disastrous. But God is faithful. 25 long years after God's initial promise to Abram, God gives him the promised son, Isaac. Even though Abraham and Sarah took matters into their own hands and messed things up, God still fulfilled His promise in His way at His desired time. He's so patient with us!

A few more years pass and we read the account of God commanding Abraham to sacrifice his promised son, Isaac. Abraham doesn't hesitate. He is quick to obey God to the letter. He has learned from his past mistakes. He doesn't try to take matters into his own hands and obey God's command in a way that makes sense to him. Instead, he has great faith that the Lord will either intervene or bring his son back to life. That's the kind of faith I long to have - a faith marked by obedience.

I've also been reading Stripped: When God's Call Turns From "Yes!" to "Why Me?" by Lina AbuJamra. One of the things that struck me while reading this book was about the Israelites time of wandering in the wilderness. We often think of this time as punishment because of their whining, complaining, and outright disobedience to the Lord. However, there's another reason. Lina writes, 

"...the wilderness was part of God's call and plan. The wilderness was meant to make them leaner, and better able to fight the battles that God had for them. The wilderness was a time of preparation and a time of purification. The wilderness was the perfect place for the Israelites to become God's people."

Sometimes our path in life isn't a straight shot, but a journey through the wilderness where God prepares us for the Promised Land. This isn't a detour, but a planned by God part of our journey that prepares us for the land of promise. What a concept! I've been praying that in all areas of my life God will help me trust Him in the wilderness as I wait for Him to fulfill His promises for me the WAY He wants, WHEN He wants. Really, it's about giving up control and waiting on the Lord. It's so hard to do, but with God all things are possible!

So I leave you with these somewhat scattered thoughts and the words to this song. Do you dare make this your prayer today?

Keep Making Me
by Sidewalk Prophets

Make me broken
So I can be healed
‘Cause I'm so calloused
And now I can't feel
I want to run to You
With heart wide open
Make me broken

Make me empty
So I can be filled
‘Cause I'm still holding
Onto my will
And I'm completed
When You are with me
Make me empty

‘Til You are my one desire
‘Til You are my one true love
‘Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making me

Make me lonely
So I can be Yours
‘Til I want no one
More than You, Lord
‘Cause in the darkness
I know You will hold me
Make me lonely‘Til You are my one desire
‘Til You are my one true love
‘Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making me