A Storm is Coming

I want to thank you for your prayers and overwhelming support over the last couple of days. The days have been difficult, but your encouragement and prayers have been a blessing.

I got a phone call from my doctor's office in Rochester yesterday afternoon saying that he couldn't talk about medicine changes until he sees me. His next available appointment is June 15th. I took the appointment and called my doctor in Eau Claire today. She said that she called his office as requested yesterday and they said that they had already set up an appointment to see me and wouldn't talk about med changes until then. She asked me to keep that appointment and see what he says. If he is helpful and changes my medication, great. If not, we will seek a second opinion at that time. And by second opinion I mean we'll fire his butt and find a new doctor! I know this is the best option. He knows my history, I won't have to go through more testing (except lab work) to see him and he did mention changing medications at my last appointment. However, that was when he thought I was having an allergic reaction to them, not because they weren't working well enough (which they haven't been for a while). I've been off and on medications since October. I've been stuck in bed for months, then got a boost of energy with prednisone. Now the prednisone is causing its own problems and I need to go off of that.

Right now I'm reading through a series that I loved when I was a kid. It's a fun, easy read and takes my mind off of how grumpy I feel. I just read about a run-a-way team of horses. I feel like I'm in the back of the wagon holding on for dear life and not having a lick of control over what happens to me. It's a terrible feeling! But you know what? When I feel like I am loosing control and when I come to the end of my own strength, that is when the light of Christ shines brighter than ever. My dear friend Emily just sent me an e-mail. She reminded me of Psalm 28:8. It says, "The Lord gives strength to his people; He is the saving refuge of His anointed." I know that my God is for me. He will give me strength and He will be my saving refuge.

Outside there is a storm brewing. The winds are howling, our little apartment is shuddering and the sun has hidden itself behind the grey clouds. When the weather changes, my body hurts. Today is no different. I feel like another storm is coming. The Bible says that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand." -Ephesians 6:12-13 (NIV) Will you stand with me? Will you help me fight? When my physical body is attacked, it is hard to put on the full armor of God and stand. When you take a beating it is so easy to just lay down and give up. But I will fight! I will put on the full armor of God and stand against the attacks of the evil one.

There is a song that has been running through my head today. It's called Before the Morning, by Josh Wilson. It's where I am right now. It's dark but the morning is coming! I leave you with the words of the song so that you also can be encouraged today in whatever trials you are facing:

Do you wonder why you have to feel the things that hurt you?

If there's a God who loves you where is He now?

Maybe, there are things you can't see

And all those things are happening to bring a better ending

Some day, some how, you'll see, you'll see

Would dare you, would you dare, to believe,

That you still have a reason to sing?

'Cause the pain you've been feeling

It can't compare to the joy that's coming

So hold on, you got to wait for the light

Press on and just fight the good fight

'Cause the pain you've been feeling

It's just the dark before the morning

My friend, you know how this all ends

And you know where you're going

You just don't know how you get there so just say a prayer.

And hold on, 'cause there's good for those who love God,

But life is not a snapshot, it might take a little time

But you'll see the bigger picture

Would dare you, would you dare, to believe

That you still have a reason to sing?

'Cause the pain you've been feeling

It can't compare to the joy that's coming

So hold on, you got to wait for the light

Press on and just fight the good fight

'Cause the pain that you've been feeling, 

It's just the dark before the morning

Yeah, yeah, before the morning,

Yeah, yeah

Once you feel the weight of glory

All your pain will fade to memory

Once you feel the weight of glory

All your pain will fade to memory, memory, memory, yeah

Would dare you, would you dare, to believe

That you still have a reason to sing?

'Cause the pain that you've been feeling

It can't compare to the joy that's coming

Come on, you got to wait for the light

Press on and just fight the good fight

'Cause the pain that you've been feeling

It's just the hurt before the healing

Oh, the pain that you've been feeling,

It's just the dark before the morning

Yeah, yeah, before the morning

Yeah, yeah, before the morning