Hello again friends!
Did you know that you have witnessed something special? Something amazing. Something exciting. Something, dare I say, miraculous?! That's right, if you have been keeping up with my blog you know that July 27-31 I was at the Dunn County Fair. Now, you may be asking yourself, what's so special, amazing, exciting and miraculous at the Dunn County Fair? That week...it was me! Before you think I have a major ego problem, keep reading!
In my last blog update I asked you to be praying for me. I asked specifically for you to "pray for strength and energy and the ability to interact well with those who come to my table." God answered your prayers! Typically when I do a craft show I get everything ready the day before. The day of I load my Jeep, drive to the venue, set up, sell for 7 hours or so, tear down, drive home, unload my Jeep and put everything away. This is a tiring process and I usually need the next day to rest and recover. With the Dunn County Fair I didn't have that option. It took me several days to get everything ready. We set up our space on Tuesday evening. Wednesday - Saturday I was there 10am-10pm and Sunday I was there 10am-5pm and then tore everything down. There is no way that I should have made it through all of that, BUT I DID! Sure, I got tired and sore, but I could stand and walk fine. It was hot and humid, but I could breathe and I didn't have any asthma issues. In fact, by Sunday when I should have been mostly dead, I was doing great! My mom came and kept me company for part of the day and she could hardly stand it. Me, I was doing fine...though the spray bottle fan did get a lot of use that day! All week I was praying for extra strength and energy and God answered my prayer, and your prayers. I didn't have an overabundance of energy, but I had enough to get me through the week. That my friends, is a miracle!
Is is just a miracle, or is it more? In church we have been going through the Gospel of John. We have been learning about the miraculous things that Jesus did while on earth. We have been learning that they more than just miracles, they are signs. They are signs because they point people to God. I really believe that the week at the fair was a sign that points me, and perhaps you, to God.
Let me try to explain. You might be saying to yourself, "Wow, Josie just went off the deep end! Miracles and signs, what is she talking about?" If you have been following my journey at all you know it has been a long road. Sometimes it seems like a long road to nowhere and then something like this happens. The months leading up to the fair have not been so great. My health problems are getting worse and I have had so many doctor appointments I've completely lost count. I am struggling with my extreme weight loss (30 pounds now since September). I have more appointments for that as they cannot figure out why it is happening. I am in the process of changing the main medication I take to keep the symptoms of the autoimmune disease under control. I have stopped taking this medication to see if it is causing the weight loss and I won't start a new medication for several weeks. I'm always in pain and have had some asthma scares recently.
So what in the world was I doing at the Fair for a week?! Honestly, I don't know! It was something that I really wanted to do and I didn't hear God telling me not to do it. It was a risk I took and I got to see God do amazing things! So it was probably just a coincidence right? The weather happened to be good so I didn't hurt as bad. Well no, it was hot and sticky and it stormed. All things that my body doesn't like. No my friends, this was miraculous. God sustained me and made the pain and fatigue tolerable enough to do what I needed to do. He also graciously allowed me to continue feeling "not horrible" this week. I have been more tired and have had a week of sleep to catch up on, but for the most part I'm doing okay. I'm back to my regular pain and fatigue, but I didn't completely crash like I was expecting.
I see this as a sign from God because it pointed me to Him, and it can point you to Him as well - that's why I'm sharing this with you. You see, I have prayed for healing so many times. I don't know why God has allowed me to be sick like this and sometimes I get angry with Him. I fight with Him. I say things like "God, don't you know how much more I could do for you if I felt better? God, what a miracle it would be if you healed me completely, so many people would see Your power and turn to You because of it." I struggle because I know God could heal me in the blink of an eye. He could speak and I would be well. He could look at me and heal my body. He could touch me and bring wholeness. Yet I'm still sick. This week at the Fair God sustained me. He looked at me and said "Josie, you will have enough energy this week. Not too much, but enough for this task I have for you." What was this task? Was it selling prints and cards at the Fair for a week? No, I don't think so. I think the task He had for me this week was to learn a lesson and share it with you! This was not a lesson I learned in a book, it was a lesson learned in the laboratory called life. I felt God sustaining me. I felt joy and strength and enough energy. Through that I learned that God is all powerful. He is all knowing. He is everywhere present. He knows me and He cares about the little details in my life, even something as strange as the Dunn County Fair (and believe-you-me, that fair is strange)!
The take-a-way for the week for me was this. If God can help me feel better for a week, He can help me feel better longer. If I am not feeling better and if I am still struggling with my health it is not because He doesn't care about me. It is not because I don't have enough faith. It is not because I don't ask Him enough. It is not because I sometimes don't pray and read His Word as often as I should. It is because He is not done using this illness in my life for His purposes. He is intentionally allowing me to be sick for a greater good. I have to continue to trust that God's plans are better than my plans and His ways are better than my ways. Yes, it's true. God wants me to be sick right now. If He didn't, I would be healthy. You know what? I'm okay with that. If my being sick draws me closer to God then I praise Him for it. If my being sick draws YOU closer to God then I praise Him for it. Who am I to expect my life to be easy? Who am I to expect that I deserve good health? I am clay in the Potters hands and He can do with me and my life whatever He wishes. This, my friends, is what I learned at the Dunn County Fair!
Oh, I almost forgot! I put some photographs on Capture Wisconsin's website this week and have gotten some amazing feedback from people already! Check it out at http://www.capturewisconsin.com/users/JosieSiler. While you're there, vote for my photographs so I can be published in a book that they are making out of the best photographs on the site. How amazing would that be?!
P.S. (If you are looking for something else to do, read the Gospel of John or listen to some sermon audios on it: http://machurch.net/audio.htm)
